What It’s Really Like to Live in a Mental Health Crisis

When someone suffers a physical injury, like breaking a leg, they’re quickly seen and surrounded by support.
Support shows up — visibly, consistently, and with care.

But when your mind breaks?

Mental illness is an illness.  It’s your brain and nervous system pushed far beyond their capacity to cope — and it shows up in your body as much as your thoughts.

Living like this can feel incredibly lonely. People don’t see it. And when they do, they may not understand it.

What It's Really Like Inside

When you touch a hot stove, your brain immediately tells you to pull away — it’s instinctive, protective.
Emotional pain, when it becomes too much to carry, activates the same emergency response.

The brain begins to scream: “You can’t keep doing this. You need to get away.”
Not because you want to die — but because your system is overwhelmed. It’s trying to survive.
The messaging becomes confused, desperate, primal. And terrifying.

That’s what it’s like when sadness turns into something deeper. You’re no longer just sad.
Your brain is on fire, and you’re trying to stay here, stay functioning — while everything inside you is sounding the alarm. You don't want to feel this way. 

Common Mental Health Stigmas That Harm More Than Help

• “People with depression aren’t safe to be around.”
  People with depression are often the most self-aware and protective of those around them.
  We overthink every interaction.
  We worry endlessly about being a burden.
  We go out of our way to make sure we’re not too much, not too quiet,  — constantly monitoring ourselves to keep others comfortable.
  We show up carefully, thoughtfully, and as safely as we can — often at the cost of our own well-being.

• “They seem fine — they must be okay.”
  People in deep pain often still work, still parent, still show up. But what you don’t see are the moments in between — the shutdowns behind closed doors, the panic in silence, the effort it takes to act “normal.”
  Unless you’re with someone every hour of every day, you won’t see the full weight they’re carrying.

• “They’re not trying hard enough to feel better.”
  You can’t out-positive a chemical imbalance or trauma response. Most people struggling with their mental health are already trying everything — therapy, medication, exercise, rest. It’s not about effort; it’s about survival.

• “They should be grateful or think of others who have it worse.”
  Gratitude and depression can coexist. Mental illness doesn’t care how “good” your life looks on the outside. Comparing pain helps no one.

• “They just need to _____”
  Sometimes getting out of bed feels like climbing a mountain. Suggesting quick fixes only adds shame to something already overwhelming.

How to Truly Support Someone in a Mental Health Crisis

• Check in — more than once.
  Don’t just send one message and disappear. Keep showing up. Even a short “no pressure to reply, just thinking of you” can be a lifeline.

• Be specific in your support.
  Instead of “let me know if you need anything,” say:

  • “Let's meet for a walk on Tuesday.”

  • “Want to sit and watch something together?”

  • “I’ll text again on the weekend, just checking in.”

• Accept that they might not respond the same way.
  Depression changes how people engage. They may go quiet. It’s not about you — it’s about survival.

• Don’t back away just because you don’t know what to say.
  You don’t need perfect words. You just need to be there. Presence matters more than advice.

• Keep reminding them they matter.
  Over and over. Even if they don’t believe it — especially then.

• Keep showing up even when it’s uncomfortable.
  You don’t need the perfect words. You just need to be there. Be willing to sit in the quiet. That alone can make someone feel loved.

And if you’re supporting someone through it: thank you. Your quiet consistency matters more than you know.